lesson from a funeral

and perhaps reminder is a better word than lesson — because what I experienced at the memorial for grandma Addie was an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for her life and the relationship I enjoyed with her, and the reminder that …
Funeral

there is no title, or achievement, no amount of position power or
money, no possession, thrilling experience or adventure in this life
that is more important than loving and serving those that are your
family [period]

I know you know this already, but there are moments when you know it on a new level and Saturday for me, was one of those moments. I’m not saying you shouldn’t work and plan and play and dream. I am saying that balance is imperative and while the right "balance" is different for everyone, the scales should tip in favor of family. I believe to my core that we are on earth to learn and grow and in a sense be "tested" to see if we can listen to our hearts more than all the other "voices" that clamor for our attention.

Might sound a little preachy for a Monday morning — but, it is what is on my mind. I’m playing "catch up" at home today — correcting the balance. I had a wonderful time in Alabama and am so grateful to Monique and her team for all they did to accomodate me and my change in schedule. ScrapETC  is a wonderful store and the event was absolutely delightful.
We hosted our first-ever "Glimpses Reception" and it did NOT go as I had invisioned. So, if you attended [or tried to attend,] PLEASE email me, so that I can send you a little something — put "glimpses reception" in the subject line, and include your address — please do this for me!

Comments

  1. It was great to see you Stacy, she led a wonderful life and I too was uplifted and inspired by all the wonderful stories. My heart goes out to you!

  2. Thank you for posting this “refresher”, focusing on what’s important in life. I’m wrestling right now with work/life/family balance, wondering if I’m doing the right things, heading in the right direction, etc., and your post really hit home. It’s obvious where my focus should be, and my type-A personality, the one that says, “Do it all! Go after that promotion! Take the better job!” needs to be quiet for a bit. Right now, the time belongs to my sixteen-month old. Period.
    Thanks.
    Best wishes as you cope with the passing of Grandma Addie… you and your family are in my prayers.

  3. Hi Stacy,
    I got the chills when I opened up your blog today, as my Grandma Helen passed away this past Monday as well, and we have just all returned from the funeral and are resuming life as usual. My heart and prayers go out to you too and thank you for the words you posted today. It was just the inspiration I needed to help get me through another day!

  4. Cindy McDannold says:

    We all feel we should express sympathy at the loss of a loved one, but I also feel that we should be grateful for those precious moments in their presence. My father died when I was just 31…but I was blessed getting to have him in my life for even those few years. I don’t feel sadness in losing him, but great happiness for having him in my heart always.

  5. Leigh Ann Brown says:

    Stacy- so sorry for your loss, but so glad you have so many happy memories of your grandmother and the way she lived her life.
    With all we feel we “have” to do and all the craziness of the world, when you boil it down it reallly is “simple”. All that’s really important is our faith and our family–thanks for the reminder.

  6. I’m touched by your post. My beloved grandmother died 19 years ago on March 16. I still miss her so much and remember always the unconditional love she gave me. There’s no greater gift and no one can do it quite like a grandmother!

  7. Thanks for being real and sharing a little bit of your life with us. I emailed you. I’m so sorry to hear about Grandma Addie.

  8. So sorry to read of the passing of Grandma Addie. Isn’t it great though, that you already have a layout scrapbooked of Little Addie with Big Addie! What a cherished piece of family history that will always be for you and yours.
    Susan

  9. Stacey I am so sorry to hear of the passing of grandma Addie. My heart and prayers go out to you and your family.

  10. Thank you for the reminder and for the beautiful photo. It’s sad that more people don’t take pictures at memorials/funerals – it’s a part of life that we tend to pull back from.
    Blessings on you and your family.

  11. Michelle M says:

    You are in my thoughts. m

  12. Well said and thank you for your honor of your grandmother and your honesty. To many times people forget about the basic necessity of balance and we all get to caught up in our own day to day lives to realize the wonders around us.

  13. heatherc says:

    Stacy, I’m grateful for your post and the reminder that came with it. But what caught my eye and heart the most was the photo you posted. That picture wouldn’t by chance have been taken in Manti, Utah cemetery? My own grandmother died 14 years ago (sometimes it still feels like yesterday)… and it is in that cemetery “in the shadow of the temple” that I visit her each year. Best wishes to you and your family.

  14. Thanks for the reminder. We all need to know why we’re here and who we need to serve, care for and love! Blessings to you and your lovely family.
    Sue

  15. couldn’t agree more…especially today

  16. My husbands Grandmother turns 97 this month. We had her birthday yesterday. Such a wonderful, long life and so many people that surround her. I made it a point to tell her how much she means to me and my family. I met you Friday night at Scrap, etc. I went home and looked through your book, again, and saw the book you did for Grandma Addie. I was so inspired and made sure that our grandmother knows how much she means to us.. It had everyone in tears (didn’t mean for it to get read aloud!). I think I summed it up for everyone and they were so thankful that I did it! I didn’t have any of my scrapbooking with me and you asked to see it. I really don’t have very much recent work. You inspired me to do so much. I need to record our life and let the people around me know how I feel about them! Thankyou for being there and giving so much to this very important art.

  17. Carra Mann says:

    Just wanted to let you know how much you inspired everyone at the event this weekend. Thanks for being there with us at such a difficult time. Your classes were amazing. I heard many people refer to you as “Energy Personified”, how true! So sorry for your loss.

  18. Stacy… my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

  19. Your picture of the funeral really struck me….I thought how fitting it was that it was so colorful, something that has become a hallmark of your own life. We’re still “recovering” from my MIL’s funeral last December, her presence is still very strong, and we are reminded daily of her influence. Now this is just my observation, but sure enough, there’s another tender mercy lingering in your life :) I’m sure that your grandma was here long enough to see her legacy pass on to your new daughter….it’s easy to see the grace that was offered to little Addie as she prepared to be a part of your family, protection was given to her the entire time, and once it was certain that she was “officially” yours….(remember the blog of the official pictures of you and Addie?) grandma was able to let go. What a blessing to have the name Addie, and what a strength to her later on, to learn of her great grandma who held on long enough to see that she was well on her way into a loving home. Take care,
    Ruby

  20. Love this so much. I just found recently that death and dying has become my calling and I am determined to use my talent as a scrapbooker to reach women. Thank you so much for sharing and for the wonderful quote! Blessings to you and yours.

  21. so sorry for your loss, I understand your thoughts today though. I recently just loss 2 friends in the last week and a half and really enjoyed reading your thoughts and agreeing with you. your in my prayers.

  22. Stacy, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

  23. couldn’t agree more! it is now 12:19am, and i realize i fell asleep with my older daughter after saying prayers and reading stories. i had on tap to do 2 assignments, a challenge and finish her birthday invitations. i woke up at 12:00am, and got her invitations finished just now.
    it is all about family.
    my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
    blessings,
    erin

  24. Heidi Gauvin says:

    i rarely post comments but i have to say that i am truly inspired by each little tidbit you give of yourself through your blog. i find myself stopping and thinking – something we rarely give ourselves time to do. thank you! please accept my sympathy on the passing of your wonderful grandmother.

  25. I WISH I could have gone. To ANY scrapping conventions….sigh.
    Thank you for putting that insight out for us…we often forget that we should focus on our families and get the right balance.

  26. Stacy, what a great legacy your Grandma Addie left– and I agree with several of the other posts, that it is such a huge blessing you have a little Addie to carry on that special name. I remember the picture you had posted of Grandma Addie holding little Addie. What a treasure! I am sorry for your loss, and thanks for reminding us to LOVE the family and make it a priority.

  27. Kat (Lovebug Kat - the chatty one) says:

    my deepest condolences on your loss. My prayers will be with you and yours in this sad time.
    I greatly admire your positive attitude, I love your blog and find it so inspiring and it is my new “happy place” these days.
    Keep up the good work Stacy.

  28. This might sound odd, but your photo and your sentiment are so timely. I’ve been struggling with how to capture such an important (but somber) life event in a respectful manner. You’ve done it so well. Thanks Stacy!
    PS: Been enjoying your book lately, keep going back to it. Feel such a connection/fit to how I approach scrapping myself. Kind of makes me feel a part of something bigger…it’s cool! Thanks!

  29. Stacy, thank you for your kind words. I am so glad that you feel confident and comfortable enough to express your feelings to us. I wish your family the best as they remember the women they knew, loved, and respected.

  30. Stacy,
    So sorry to hear about your loss. I have always enjoyed the layouts that have featured your Grandma Addie, as I also had a Grandma Addie in my life & have been missing her since 1998.
    Your love for your Grandma Addie has been very apparent through the years & especially so with the arrival of baby Addie in your family. Such a wonderful legacy of love. I know you will miss her dearly.
    Sending prayers of peace your way!

  31. I never leave comments because I know how busy you are to be trying to keep up with reading e-mails, comments, etc but I just had to on this one. My deepest condolences and best wishes to you and your family. You are so inspiring and I know that your grandmother had a great influence on your life. How wonderful to have had her in your life – and continue to have her in your heart with you everyday. Thank you for sharing. I was throwing a pity party for myself today – a bit strung out on the SAHM thing – and I thank you for the perspective check. Best wishes.

  32. Well said. Sometimes we forget these things. Get caught up in life and the unimportant things.
    I hope your fond memories of her will comfort you during this difficult time.

  33. Very well said. You have such a way with words.

  34. RScrapIT says:

    Stacy, Thanks for sharing that reminder. It is one we all need to be reminded of often. My thoughts and prayers are with you right now. I lost one of my grandma’s Nov 2005 and I still miss her dearly, but I am so thankful to have been blessed by having the opportunity to have a close and long relationship with her.

  35. You have no idea how your words describe exactly how I have been feeling since my husband moved into his new job. Our family has been pushed to the back burner for a demanding boss who wants more and more of my hubby’s time. Lately, he has been at the job 18-20 hours a day with no time for our children or ourselves. I’ve copied and sent him your post. I hope it might help him to see how I’ve been feeling myself.
    Thank you.

  36. Stacy, you inpsire me (and I’m sure thousands of others. And for that, thank you. In our busy lives (I know you get loads of people in classes, I’m the one that did the Album in a Day at CKC Seattle this past Nov.) on, Yours, Mine and Ours. 2 kids, 6 stepkids and working on the 10th grandchild! This puts it all into perspective!

  37. I was saddened to hear that you lost your Gandma Addie. I had been touched when you brought little Addie back and had that picture of the two of them on your blog. I will pray that your family finds peace and comfort during this difficult time in His arms.

  38. Stacy — I am a student in your current Big Picture LOM class. Because you’ve shared your philosophy about being a family journalist – and not necessarily an historian — I have learned the important of capturing not only the photo but the feelings. Your beautiful photo on your blog no doubt will find its way to a treasured place in your Library of Memories, and it won’t matter what paper or embellishments you use because you’ll have the words to express the feelings. (And if not now, when it’s right … another thing I’ve learned from you.)
    Please know that you, better than anyone I’ve come across, know — and exemplify — the art of balancing all the right things, including service to your family. Your blog, your scrapbook classes, your writings as an editor … it’s there for all of to share in, witness and emulate.
    Deepest sympathy to you and your family at this time of loss.

  39. kat-in-texas says:

    Stacy, my heart and prayers go out to you and your sweet family in this time of transition. We could see your grandmother’s sweetness in her eyes. You’ve inherited those traits yourself. Hope you get back in to your groove soon. We sure have missed your happy blog this week! BIG HUG & A SMOOTCH!

  40. Stacy, I am so sorry to hear you lost your grandma. I lost my grandfather 2 years ago who I too was very close to and shared a special relationship with, and there is not a day I dont miss him.
    The photo you posted of her with her namesake when little Addie first came home has always stuck in my memory and I am so pleased they were able to meet each other.
    Thinking of you xo

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